


Payback!

by starbender



Series: Metamorphosis [1]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Episode: s01e10 Prime Factors, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-28
Updated: 2016-10-28
Packaged: 2018-08-27 10:09:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8397508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starbender/pseuds/starbender
Summary: B'Elanna's experience of being the 'hot topic of the week' on Voyager has unexpected results.  Added Moment to Prime Factors.





	

"Oh, damn it.” B’Elanna threw her calipers down on the floor. The one thing she hated more than messing up was not being able to keep it a secret. Picking up the tool, she left the area, knowing her crew would start talking about her the minute she was out of sight. Reminding herself the recent fiasco was a joint effort and their motivations pure was no consolation.

She took the turbo lift to her upper workstation so she wouldn’t have to face them, but there was no escaping a guilty conscience. _How can the captain trust me after this?_ Every bad decision she ever made started playing on a continuous loop inside her head. Everyone had been right about her. Her mother, her Academy teachers, the Starfleet crew who questioned her ‘promotion’ over Joe Carey-

Someone entering the room interrupted her thoughts. She groaned inwardly as Tom Paris intruded into her private place. She fastened her eyes back on her console, wondering if she could get by without acknowledging him.

“Lieutenant Torres. The helm report," Paris said, using that same tone he always used around her. Guarded amusement. It was annoying most of the time and now it was downright infuriating.

“You couldn’t have left that with someone downstairs?” She asked, talking more to the panel than to him.

“The last time I did that you apparently didn’t see it for two days and you lectured me about it, in the mess hall. In front of everyone. You made it clear I was to hand it to you personally.” Nice even clipped tones. No hidden undercurrent of anger in his voice.

  
She hated it when he was right. _Every time he made a mistake or messed up I was right there, telling him what I thought about it, not caring if we had an audience._

“Just put it down there. I’ll get to it,” she said still refusing to look at him. She waited, insults at the ready just in case he started anything. He would say something snarky, something hurtful. She knew he had been waiting for just this moment.

“Of course, Lieutenant.” The padd made a light clinking sound as he dropped it on the panel. She didn’t look up as he left the room. That was it? He was obviously playing some kind of head game with her. Maybe _he_ was waiting until they had an audience.

Was his latest screw-up just a few weeks ago?

_So Paris, you volunteering for the next away mission? I saw the ambassador’s wife. She looks like your type._

  
_If your type has scales, that is._

  
It was funny at the time. Seska never tried to be discreet. He must have overheard.

But no matter what Tom had done on Banean, he didn’t almost blow up the ship. It took real talent to pull that off. She closed her eyes, seeing it again, mentally castigating herself for blindly linking that incompatible alien technology to Voyager’s systems. That wasn’t the sort of thing people just brushed off. Eventually, she would have to face everyone.  As much as she wanted too, B’Elanna knew she couldn’t hide out in engineering forever.

After a few hours of self-imposed solitary confinement, she made her way back to the lower level. The level of chatter ceased immediately confirming her suspicions. They had been talking about her. Without looking around her she marched straight through the doors to the corridors.

She used to eat lunch with Seska, but Chakotay had assigned her best friend to Gamma shift. Not exactly a punishment for their part in the Sikarinan Incident, but close enough. It meant facing the mess hall alone. The sound of the closing door behind her gave way to a wall of silence. Everyone in the room stopped eating to look at her. Part of her wanted to march into Neelix’s kitchen and start throwing his pots and pans against the wall, but she refused to provide them with any more entertainment. Without a word, she turned around to go back into the hallway, but found herself with no sense of purpose. Wandering around aimlessly in the corridors didn’t appeal to her, besides, she would run into other members of the crew who would give her that judgmental ‘look’ that she used to throw to other people. She didn’t want to hide out in her quarters. That would feel too much like giving up.  An idea popped into her head.

“Computer, locate Harry Kim.”

“Ensign Kim is in his quarters.” He was someone to talk to. Harry didn't judge people and knew the whole sordid story. She headed off in the direction of his quarters without a second thought.

After hearing his invitation, the door hissed open. Harry greeted her but all she saw was Paris sitting there, leaning forward, his elbows on his knees, staring down at the floor. She castigated herself for her lapse in judgment. Of course, he would be here. _Why didn’t I ask the computer?_

She started to back out. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you weren’t alone.” Before she could turn around Harry was by her side.

“No, please stay. Tom and I were just talking about what happened and…” Harry’s features were contorted into his classic sad face.

“Funny, that's what _I_ wanted to talk about but I'll just say, I'm sorry about everything, Harry. You can get back to talking about me because I know that's what you were doing. Everyone else is.” Once again she started to leave, but this time Harry laid a hand on her arm, gently restraining her.

"Actually, we were talking about me,” Harry said. The serious nature of his tone made B’Elanna turn around to face her friend.

“Harry thinks it was all his fault,” Paris said as he sat upright. B’Elanna searched for that smirk he used when he was being sarcastic, but it wasn’t there.

"I suppose you have an opinion?" She snapped. She was tired of waiting. She wanted Paris to stop messing around and just say what was on his mind.

“I wasn’t saying anything at all. I was just letting him talk.”

“Come in, B’Elanna. Please.” Harry begged before she could react to Tom's response. “I don’t know how I could be so stupid.”

“How you...Harry! How could you possibly think this was all your fault?” she asked. She remained standing by the door because she knew she couldn't relax with Paris in the room.

“Because I’m the one who gets overexcited whenever I think we've found a quick way home. I keep getting ahead of myself. If I had just kept my mouth shut-”

“You weren’t the one who stole the device. You weren’t the one who attempted to use incompatible technology without checking it out first. You’re not the one who almost blew up the ship. I don’t know why I’m not in the brig.”

“Because you are valuable to Voyager,” Paris said quietly. “No one else can do what you do.” His quiet demeanor was getting downright unnerving. He should be laughing at her, taunting her. Why wasn’t he? “It’s not the first time one of us has made an error in judgment.”

_Error in judgment. That was it?_

“I should have just kept my big mouth shut,” Harry repeated. “I need to accept that we’re not going to make it home for a long, long time.”

“I think you just need to slow down and enjoy the ride, but that’s just me,” Paris said.

“Just like you were doing on Banean?” B’Elanna said. _Damn it Paris. Say something. Anything. Get it over with already!_   Paris remained silent.

“B’Elanna, shut up!” Harry’s face went from sad to angry in the blink of an eye. “Did you see what happened to Tom during one of those cycles?” He demanded. B'Elanna was taken aback by his reaction. Paris was supposed to react to her goading, not Harry.

“No, I didn’t.” She had heard about it, but the fact that Paris had suffered hadn’t touched off any feelings of sympathy.

“Well if you had, you would have seen that it was terrible. He was in extreme pain, not only physical but psychological. He paid too much for his horrible, horrible crime of...flirting with a woman,” Harry said. “Because in the end, that’s all he did.”

B’Elanna let that sink for a moment. Harry wouldn’t lie about something like that. “You mean you and she didn’t…” _All the nasty jokes, all the cruel insinuations._

“Sorry to disappoint.” This time Paris smiled. “If you don’t believe me, you can ask Tuvok. Or the Doctor, he did an ARA scan. I wasn't completely innocent, but the truth is, hardly anything happened. But none of that matters now. What matters is we stop Harry from being so hard on himself.” Tom directed his attention away from B’Elanna to Harry. “You have to stop beating yourself up over this.” His eyes went back to B’Elanna. “And so do you, Torres. From what I hear, you were the one that destroyed the trajector, saving the day.”

“Yeah, I was a real hero,” she said as sarcastically as she could. She was uncomfortably aware that, despite her snarky comments, she and Paris were having an almost normal conversation.

Paris stood up, allowing himself a good stretch. “We’re still here, aren’t we? Why don’t we finish this conversation over lunch? I know for a fact that Harry here has some replicator rations saved up so why don’t we go to the mess hall and treat ourselves.”

“Go out there?” B’Elanna visibly shuddered.

“Yeah, why not? What’s the worst thing they can do? Talk about us?” Tom smiled. For the first time, B'Elanna felt the gentle sting of guilt. Paris had gone out there day after day with this ‘thing’ waiting for him. The ‘thing’ that she helped create.

“I’d rather not.” _I can’t face them. Not yet_. She could hold her own against Cardassian raiders without flinching but sitting down with Paris in a public place while being the hot topic of the week was asking too much, even if Harry was there to serve as a buffer.

“Don’t tell me that after all this, you still don’t want to be seen talking to me? Face it, Torres, you’ve crossed over to the dark side,” Paris said. Now there was sarcasm. Now he was being the smart-mouthed Tom Paris. Harry finally let a small smile cross his face.

“Is this some kind of joke? This your way of rubbing it in?" B’Elanna asked, crossing her arms in front of her. Was he trying to lure her into the mess hall just so he could finally have his revenge in public?

“No, this is my way of saying I’m hungry, I’m going to get something to eat and you’re welcome to join us. Look, I know you’re not used to being on this side of things, but after you get used to it, it’s not so bad. Besides, we’ve got Harry to protect us.”

“I can't.” _Mercenary, liar, maybe, but not a murderer, and apparently not an adulterer either- and he doesn't hold grudges._ “You two go ahead.”

“Well, take it from me. Best just to shrug it off. The whole cold shoulder thing won’t last long. Next week, they’ll find something new to talk about. This will all be forgotten.”

Lying in bed later that evening B’Elanna stared at the ceiling to her quarters. The first day after the Incident had been stressful. She still hadn’t braved the mess hall but her team had managed to move past it. Maybe she had helped talk some sense into Harry. She still didn’t know what to make of Paris and his attitude. She wondered what Seska would make of it when they were finally able to get together and talk again. _Could it be_ ….she yawned to herself as she drifted off… _t_ _hat we were wrong about Paris?_


End file.
